I think it’s nice to have a site that offers cached resources when I visit. But I want the return of the cached resource to send a request to the source server, instead of nothing and not seeing the record on the original server
The easiest way to get that is if your site sends a Cache-Control header for max-age=0. That way, it’s cached, but will always revalidate, which sends a request to the server:
Yes. All requests to the source server do. But REVALIDATED takes less, since it’s not pulling the full resource. Just enough headers to determine if it should be refreshed or not.